Hello and goodbye and goodbye

August will go down in my personal history as a month of hellos and goodbyes and goodbyes.  I have thought ahead to this month and all that was going to be happening, but I had no idea how much it would impact me.

I probably shouldn’t be writing right now while I feel so tender, but then again, maybe now is the best time to write.

Three weeks ago I said goodbye to Elder Jaden Walker. We’ve received three letters. Thursday has become the new highlight of my week because that’s when we get his letter. He’s working hard, I can tell. He seems happy, if not a little anxious. He’s learning about prayer, and relying on God. He’s learning Spanish and how to be a missionary. I won’t lie—it seems like I haven’t seen him for three months not three weeks. I miss him like crazy. I write him often and send him a package or two a week, but I’d sure like to see his cute face and give him a hug.



Jaden leaves for the MTC.



My hello was a sweet one. Little Grace Leila Gonzales joined our family on August 24.  She looks so much like Lynzy did as a baby--thick dark hair and a cute little fist pumping the air when she's upset or impatient.  She is a beautiful gift.  Lynzy is now a momma, and such a sweet one. Little Grace was a week late, but once she decided to arrive, she came so quickly the doctor missed the birth and a student nurse, only three days on the job, literally caught her. We are o thankful she's here safe and sound and that she has such good parents.  Keith and Lynzy are so mindful of their little daughter. It's so wonderful to see my daughter with a daughter of her own.

Lynzy, Grace (1 hour old), and Keith - a beautiful family

This morning I said goodbye to Dave. He just left for Minnesota. We’ve known all summer this day was coming ever nearer. We’ve been excited for him, in fact. To have such a good job in these crazy economic times is a blessing. But this morning as the U-Haul got more and more full with all his earthly possessions (it wasn’t much, but more than we thought!), it hit me that although I’d said goodbye many times to Dave over the last ten years as he left for his mission, summer work, EFI, and internships, this was the first time he was leaving that I didn’t know when he’s coming back.

Nana is always willing to go along for the ride.

Luckily he has some good traveling companions—Nana and Papa and Jesse are riding along. That helped a lot. To see him pull away in his truck alone would have been horrible. They’ll stay until Wednesday and help him get all moved in. It’s Thursday I worry about Dave. The family leaves and he goes back to his new apartment and new city all alone. He doesn’t know a soul. I know that feeling and it’s no fun. Luckily Sunday will come soon and he’ll connect with a ward full of young people.



Jesse and Nana ready to roll.


Minnesota is a good fit for Dave. He loves the cold, fishing and camping and such. But he also loves his family and spending time with us, and I know he’s not looking forward to being away.





Papa and Dave ready for the long ride to Minnesota.



All the emotions that come with saying hello and goodbye are a reminder of how important our families are. Love is what makes it hurt so much to say goodbye. Love is the overwhelming joy of saying hello.

So as of today, September 2, 2011 Doug and I are officially empty nesters. Two bedrooms upstairs that for 20 years have been the headquarters of one child or another, now sit empty and quiet. There are no wet towels on the floor, Jaden’s shoes aren’t in the middle of the kitchen, no music is coming from Dave’s room. No, the house is so quiet I can hear ringing in my own ears. I could probably hear my own heart beating if I listened a little closer. I already miss the phase I’m leaving. I always knew I would.